Move Over, Stephen King...
You know that inexplicable urge to scare yourself silly with horror movies? Or to look at the gruesome car wreck on the shoulder of the highway? You know you'll regret it and won't be able to erase the images from your mind--but you just HAVE TO LOOK.
That's exactly what happened with my roommate's "Maternity Care" textbook. It was just sitting there, deceitfully innocent with it's snuggly-little-baby-printed cover--and I decided that there'd be no harm in having a little look-see into the world of pregnancy and labor.
And I'd give ANYTHING to go back and undo that monumentally terrible decision.
There were NO snuggly baby pictures anywhere on the inside pages of that wretched book. But there were pictures galore of placentas, massive vaginas, deformed fetuses, pain, grotesquely shaped bodies, and indiscernible bloody objects.
It was truly the stuff of nightmares. (And in my opinion, the absolute best way to cut down on teenage pregnancy rates in this country would be to make homeroom classes sit through a live birth. Convents would have to add entire new buildings overnight just to accommodate the influx.)
My one question is WHY? WHY does the earth continue to re-populate if this is what it takes? WHY would anyone be foolish enough to try natural birth? WHY is it possible for something that big to come out of something so small? WHY, in the year 2006, has science not found an easier way (like growing them in sacs outside the body...or in cartons of warm cream)?!?
And I'd really like someone to explain the phrase, "gift of childbirth". If that bloody horror is synonymous for "gift" in your book...you're obviously getting the wrong damn presents.
That's exactly what happened with my roommate's "Maternity Care" textbook. It was just sitting there, deceitfully innocent with it's snuggly-little-baby-printed cover--and I decided that there'd be no harm in having a little look-see into the world of pregnancy and labor.
And I'd give ANYTHING to go back and undo that monumentally terrible decision.
There were NO snuggly baby pictures anywhere on the inside pages of that wretched book. But there were pictures galore of placentas, massive vaginas, deformed fetuses, pain, grotesquely shaped bodies, and indiscernible bloody objects.
It was truly the stuff of nightmares. (And in my opinion, the absolute best way to cut down on teenage pregnancy rates in this country would be to make homeroom classes sit through a live birth. Convents would have to add entire new buildings overnight just to accommodate the influx.)
My one question is WHY? WHY does the earth continue to re-populate if this is what it takes? WHY would anyone be foolish enough to try natural birth? WHY is it possible for something that big to come out of something so small? WHY, in the year 2006, has science not found an easier way (like growing them in sacs outside the body...or in cartons of warm cream)?!?
And I'd really like someone to explain the phrase, "gift of childbirth". If that bloody horror is synonymous for "gift" in your book...you're obviously getting the wrong damn presents.
posted by Rachel at 3:59 PM
1 Comments:
"the absolute best way to cut down on teenage pregnancy rates in this country would be to make homeroom classes sit through a live birth"
In addition, tell the kids they can't drink for a year. That oughta wrap it up.
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