Thursday, July 20, 2006

Modesty, Schmodesty

I've been feeling a little shitty for several days now. (But just a little. Not enough to keep me from Mafiaoza'sing or Body Sculpting with Daniel.) I just figured that with a little extra sleep last night, I'd be back to my 100% sunny self today.

WRONG. The first thought that ran through my half-awake mind this morning was, "I'm going to track down whoever gave this to me and kick them between the shoulder soon as I muster the energy."

My throat ached, my mouth tasted chalky and my limbs felt heavy. But being the diligent employee that I am, I hauled myself into the shower where I proceeded to lean against the wall and pray for a swift death.

After spending several minutes staring blankly at my computer screen once I got to work, I sucked it up and called my doctor. The receptionist who answered the phone must have taken pity on my croaky voice and promised she'd rush me to the head of the morning wait list.

Upon arrival, she greeted me warmly and told me not to even bother with signing in. Then she asked, "Now when was the last time you've been in?" I sheepishly muttered, "Monday"...but caught myself before adding, "I'm the one that couldn't figure out the gown and flashed Dr. C. I'm sure you probably heard."

A nurse ushered me to an examining room and told me that Dr. C would be with me shortly. Sure enough, it wasn't five minutes before he poked his head in the door and grinned. "Back so soon?"

"Yeah, I figured it was about time I showed you my left boob." (So, I tend to get a little bit snarkier when I don't feel good...)

He threw his head back and laughed. And grinned the entire time he prodded and swabbed me. He then winked at me and chuckled on his way to the lab. (I think I just might have inadvertently rocketed myself to "new favorite patient" status.)

The lab results came back negative for strep, which is good. But I apparently have an ugly throat infection caused by "over exertion." He said the best and quickest thing he could give me was a shot. But at that point, I hardly cared. I just wanted to feel better for this weekend's wedding festivities.

And then he said the dreaded words: "I'll need you to bend over."

So Dr. C has now officially been introduced to both my right boob and right ass cheek.

Hell, at the rate we're going, he'll probably see my full naked self within a week.


Blogger Morgan said...

Trsut me, it's much worse to be a male and to have a female doctor, for reasons that I won't go into here (or anywhere else for that matter). But honestly, shouldn't your dcotor be buying you flowers or something by now?

9:31 AM  
Anonymous Mister Nashville said...

I was gonna ask when you were meeting his parents.

2:05 PM  

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