Neckfest 2K7

In a moment of true inspiration, some friends and I decided to grace Silverado's with our presence Saturday night. Granted, it's not a place we frequent often (or ever), but you really can't beat $7 all-you-can-drink longnecks.

Before we'd even gotten INTO the bar, we witnessed a woman screaming hysterically and slapping a barrel-chested man in the parking lot. (I dared Greg to roll down his window and politely ask if they were leaving and could we have their spot, but no dice.)

Once in the bar, beer in hand, the fun ensued.

The best possible way to amuse yourself at a dive like Silverado's is to have a "Redneck Photo Scavenger Hunt". Yes, you read that right. The object is to come up with a list of the funniest, most stereotypically redneck things and take pictures of them once found. But this requires extreme stealth.

All in all, we didn't do too badly. We found a solid 6 out of 10:

1) A man in jeans so tight, he has a permanent wedgie:

2) Tackiest dressed person (yes, that is in fact a prom dress with cowboy boots):

3) Little man in a big hat:

4) Big man in a little hat:

5) Least hygienic person (yes, that is definitely back sweat...and Chad's loving it):

6) A non-Hispanic minority (this man's presence impressed us):

For whatever reason, we couldn't seem to find: 7) a pregnant lady smoking, 8) a mullet 9) huge female hair and 10) a couple who shouldn't procreate (mainly because we couldn't agree on a winner for it).

In between photo ops, we tried our hand on the dance floor...where we managed to piss some folks off with our complete lack of coordination. Several hours later, after laughing our heads off and sweating profusely, we decided to brave Decades.

Let me tell you, after the redneckness of Silverado's, I've never in my life felt more at home dancing to a Michael Jackson song while holding a fishbowl.

Despite the fact I was still wearing shit kickers.